Starting Monday morning at 137.4lbs
Not bad if i do say so.
Now girls ... Off topic from weight and food etc. But one thing about this specific 'diet' Is that it effects our lives is more ways than one.
Relationships.
Im Screwed in this case.
I miss my free time, i miss having that one night to myself.
Now its everynight with R. Every second of the day he texts me.
When im with him he can sense something is up and so he smothers me with affection which is the opposite of what i need right now.
If i left him-god its hard to explain without sounding big headed. He would be distraught. It would ruin him. He would probably kill either himself or me.
Im scared to even have sex with him ...its been Forever. Like Over a month forever. Long time for a relationship thats only 8months old.
we will make out and he will grab my wrists and put them above my head...I used to like it when a guy took control. And to this day i wouldnt mind it. IF that is he didnt hold on so tight id have to scream out in pain to get him to get off me, which sometimes he doesnt as he thinks i just want to be in control. Well i think thats why he doesnt let go.
So if hes like that making out im petrified of having sex and him being a little too rough and hurting me. Im probably way over thinking this but yer. its what im thinking.
Do i miss being single? Yes, of course i do. I go out with my single friends and we get attention from very yummy boys and they get to have them and make out and take them back and i just have to sit from the sidelines wishing i had their lives.
perhaps its the fact that i need more couple friends. I have though about this. and it was good when my Friend was dating R's mate. Was great fun.
I just miss mee time and doing what i want to do.
I want to go travellling. R doesnt and kicks up when its bought up that i want to go.
I hate the town were i live and want to leave. R will stay here forever and ever!
Im 20. R is 27
R wants to settle down. I most deffinitly do not.
Have to admit im bringing up the negatives. He does have good points. im just not really seeing them at the moment.
-Love C
xxxxxxx
what ever you do about R make you he does not stop living your life! Travelling and exploring the world is one of the most amazing, fun, life changing experiences you could ever have! xx
ReplyDeleteFirst let me say congrats on reaching 137. Here we come 130!
ReplyDeleteI wish you would have told me that this guy was 7 years older than you. This makes a huge difference in the way this man thinks.
Now I am not saying I know but from what you are telling me about R. The man has some issues and most likely some relationship problems in the past for him to be some overbearing and not giving you any free time.
As I said before you need to communicate that to him. Hey you know I need some me time. I am just going to go hang with my friends or go window shopping. Whatever it is you would like to do alone. As for the whole sex thing. Yes you need to tell him that he is hurting. It pisses me off that you did and he kept holding on tighter.( thus me saying the man has issues, serious issues )
Hanging out with other couples is a great idea. That is if you know any. Like my hubby meets lots of couple friends and I tend to always meet the single people. Kind of sad since I got married I barely hang out with my friends. Mostly because I am tired and we only have one car. Then when you start hanging out with couples sometimes you found out their relationship problems the longer you hang out with them and then it gets kind of weird.
I hope you take my advice and tell R that you need sometime to yourself every now and then and about this rough sex thing. I am not liking the sound of this guy. I am serious, he sounds like he has some issues. Take care C.
I agree with Winter on that you need to communicate the hurting thing to him. I once dated a guy where he was too rough one night, but I never told him or anyone, and I couldn't be intimate with anyone for a while. For me, the idea of relationships are just Uugh, because I don't want commitment or seriousness with anyone, but I've been so confused lately, when I have no reason to be. But I would definitely sit down with your guy and have a serious conversation.
ReplyDelete