Still that horrible 144.8lbs
Havent gained, but worst of all i havent lost. I dont want to be this fat girl anymore.
In such an antisocial mood today-think its because of the weight, i dont like it not moving. I dont want to go back into plateau. Is this going to happen every week?
R was trying to banter and have a laugh and i just snapped and refusing to text back because im going to bite his head off. He doesnt understand. Nobody understands.
I can hold a front up at work, make them think im in an OK mood. Im just using my illness as an excuse for my ergh mood.
R was trying to banter and have a laugh and i just snapped and refusing to text back because im going to bite his head off. He doesnt understand. Nobody understands.
I can hold a front up at work, make them think im in an OK mood. Im just using my illness as an excuse for my ergh mood.
I just want to curl up in bed and starve untill all of the weight dissapears.
On a fruit and veg diet today. Obviously sticking to under 500cal.
Going to go swimming tonight, that will sort my head out.
I dont know whats wrong with me, i thought i was fine when i woke up. I saw the scales, was dissapointed i hadnt lost but was happy i hadnt gained. Then its just slowly gone downhill without me really noticing.
Why am i snapping at R, he's done nothing wrong. Why cant i just say sorry, and go back to talking normally. He was the one person who always made me feel like i didnt have to put on a act when i was with him for my mood.
On a fruit and veg diet today. Obviously sticking to under 500cal.
Going to go swimming tonight, that will sort my head out.
I dont know whats wrong with me, i thought i was fine when i woke up. I saw the scales, was dissapointed i hadnt lost but was happy i hadnt gained. Then its just slowly gone downhill without me really noticing.
Why am i snapping at R, he's done nothing wrong. Why cant i just say sorry, and go back to talking normally. He was the one person who always made me feel like i didnt have to put on a act when i was with him for my mood.
But now he's just like the rest. Im going to have to work extra hard to not let my really happy mood/really down mood be noticed by anyone.
Im starting to feel how i did before i got mild depression. And i dont have my old best friend who was going through the same thing to help me through this.
Im starting to feel how i did before i got mild depression. And i dont have my old best friend who was going through the same thing to help me through this.
What can i do to get happy again? Why am i so...i dont even know a word for it, not grumpy, not angry, more just down and lonely.
Sorry for the depressing post.
Stay strong and think thin.
-C
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